10 years in BJJ and 10 lessons I’ve learned (Part 5)
“Fortune favors the bold.” – Virgil
“Swift and resolute action leads to success; self-doubt is a prelude to disaster.” Joseph Addison
“Never mind about maneuvers, go straight at them” -Admiral Horatio Nelson
There is more to Brazilian Jiu-jitsu than winning or losing; don’t be fearful of losing – Brazilian Jiu-jitsu is an amazing sport with a very competitive community. More and more tournaments and competitions pop up all the time. Even in the gym, practitioners roll hard to submit or out position their teammates. This healthy competition keeps BJJ an ever evolving and increasingly effective martial art. Despite it being labeled the “soft art”, in my eyes, true BJJ is rough. But its real and it’s honest. Without this competitive nature it would surely go the way of McDojo TMA’s where everything is linked to a hypothetical scenario that the instructor has never experienced (i.e stopping an armed gunman with a death blow to some pressure point).
This competitive streak is a double edged sword though. It can cause BJJ players to develop a fear of losing and make them shy away from opening up their game. Made a prisoner on the mat because of a faulty mindset and restricted to a select few techniques. I’ve personally been a victim of it and I’ve seen plenty of my students experience the same irrational fear. People will build up their opponent, and by the time the match comes around they are no longer focused on winning. Rather they are now concentrated on not losing. This misplaced fear and anxiety is detrimental to performance on the mats both in the gym and in competition. This post will focus on how it has personally affected me with some take away points at the end.
Unable to open up on the mat
There are certain matches I can look back at where I was unable to open up with my game. These matches usually came as a result of a poor mindset walking out on the mat. The guy may have been a well-known competitor and I let it get to my head or maybe he had submitted me previously and I felt afraid of getting caught again. These matches, win or lose, are the worst. No matter the outcome I feel like I didn’t show my true self on the mat and that I didn’t perform to the best of my abilities.
Then there are those matches where I felt perfect. A strange sense of calmness took over my mind even if the match was going at a furious pace. I wasn’t worried about who my opponent was or the outcome of the match. Instead my concentration was completely centered on the moves I was trying to execute and the game I was trying to play. These matches are the best because, win or lose, I was able to display my game to the best of my ability because I wasn’t consumed by any inhibiting worry.
A few personal examples (I have so many more)
1. A few weeks ago was a match where I felt satisfied with the way the match played out even though I lost. Don’t get me wrong, I would have loved to come out with my arm raised, and I was close to doing so, but we can’t win them all. When the match started I was not worried about my opponent. I was just focused on engaging him and going after the win. The match between us was fantastic and at the end we were both exhausted. I was also able to see some of the things I need to work on leading up to bigger tournaments next year. It’s also worth mentioning that I received a sizable amount of recognition and admiration for this match even though it was a loss. People enjoyed that my opponent and I were moving and attacking the whole match instead of playing it safe. Granted I don’t think I could have played it safe against him even if I wanted!
2. Last year I faced an opponent who had submitted me years ago as a purple belt. When we stepped on the mat I would be lying if I said the thought of being choked out years ago wasn’t running through my head. The match wasn’t anything to write home about. It was ugly, in the sense that neither of us really “went for it.” I ended up winning in overtime and I felt very disappointed with my performance. I knew I had more in me but I was being cautious because I didn’t want to lose again. Nothing worse than walking off the mat feeling like you lost, even though you had your hand raised. As luck would have it I had another match against the same opponent later on that day. This time I was not worried about the match that happened in 2008, instead I was solely focused on opening up my game to the best of my abilities. I didn’t want to feel disappointed after the match again. During this 2nd engagement I pulled guard, swept my opponent and secured a rear naked choke in less than 2 minutes. Nothing really changed between the two encounters that day except my mindset and my focus.
3. When I was a white belt of 6 months I competed in the 2004 Arnolds. Relson Gracie ran the tournament back then and it was an incredible display of BJJ. Minus the fact that was poorly ran and you had no idea when you were going to compete. It was a two day tournament with gi and no gi running on different days. The no gi day was done in a way where white-purple belts made up the “amateur” division and brown/blacks made up the “pro” division. I was stuck in a mixture of guys who had been training from 6 months to 8 years. I know this because I talked with many of the guys in the warm up area and casually threw out the question, “how long have you been training?” When I walked out to the mat I was greeted with the face of a grappler who had been training for over 6 years. I remember smiling, shaking my head a little and laughing while I was walking out onto the mat. When we shook hands before the match I grinned a bit and told him, “don’t rough me up too bad.” Again the lack of fear came over me. I whole heartedly expected to lose this match and so I went into it with the mindset of “if I am going to lose, I am going to make him work for it.” During the match I was able to score several takedowns and managed to escape a few leg lock attacks. For some reason my opponent kept trying to wrestle with me for the takedown. I was clearly the superior wrestler in this match so I was more than happy to trade takedowns. If he would have played more of a ground based game I’m sure I would have been in trouble. The match ended with the points being 6-2 in my favor. This was probably the best moment I experienced as a white belt, beating a purple belt. I was able to execute a great performance in this match because I had nothing to lose. I believed in my mind that I was going to be beaten and so my goal was simply to perform my best. This clear-headedness gave me the ability to get myself out of some nasty spots during the match and out position my technical superior for the win.
If you are reading this I would like you to understand that the idea of this post is to illustrate how harmful the fear of losing can be to a grappler. How so many of us get so wrapped up with the idea of just winning or losing, that it hinders our abilities. This can even happen in the gym sometimes as well. A little anxiety and nervousness before a tournament is necessary, it keeps us on our toes and gives our gives our minds an ultra-focused state. The problem arises when we worry about all the things that aren’t in our control. Our opponent’s abilities, how our students will look at us if we lose, the way our instructor will view us if we lose, how our teammates will look at the match if we lose, etc. I speak from experience when I say I’ve experienced all of these. I also speak from experience when I say that if you lose the probability of any of these things being affected in a negative way is almost nonexistent. Instead we should focus on the things we can control such as our training leading up to the tournament, our skills and abilities and how we plan to win the match. We train hard and we do ourselves a disservice if we allow worry to make us hesitant on the mat, because I believe that the best way to put your true abilities on display in a tournament is to be aggressive with your techniques.
Lose the fear
– Worrying about winning and losing too much leads to hesitation.
-Don’t build your opponents up. Before tournaments matches, be sure to focus on your strengths and abilities. Go into the match focused on using your game to the best of your abilities rather than worrying about simply winning or losing.
-Never be ashamed of a loss. But you should be disappointed if you were not able to engage your opponent to the best of your abilities because you felt worried or nervous.
-If you lose, learn from it. Figure out the mistakes you made and correct them. BJJ is about learning and self-improvement.
-Set up mock tournaments in the gym with teammates. Adding tournament style rules and points can make for highly competitive situations in the gym and can help prepare you for future tournaments. You’ll get a more mild version of that adrenaline dump you experience in actual tournaments.
-Compete more often! The more you get out there the easier it will be to deal with the pressure of competing. Just like any other game.
P.S. I’m sorry this post was so damn long.