10 years in BJJ and 10 lessons I’ve learned (Part 3)

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“Mental toughness is many things and rather difficult to explain. Its qualities are sacrifice and self-denial. Also, most importantly, it is combined with a perfectly disciplined will that refuses to give in. It’s a state of mind – you could call it character in action.” – Vince Lombardi

 

“Courage isn’t having the strength to go on – it is going on when you don’t have strength.” – Napoleon Bonaparte” 

(I like to think to interpret this quote with “courage” replaced with “mental toughness.”)

 

“Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.” – Mahatma Gandhi

 

“That which does not kill us makes us stronger.” – Friedrich Nietzsche

Fun video of Cary Kolat sharing a story of mental toughenss. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjzVVT8JTeM

 

10. Mental Toughness- I often talk to my students about the pesky voices that will present themselves when they find them in bad positions, when they become tired, or when they are nervous. Do you know what I am talking about? Have you ever been exhausted and stuck under someone’s crushingly heavy top pressure, having a conversation inside your head about whether or not to give up the fight? I have. The situation reminds me of the old cartoons where you would see a devil and angel sitting on top of the character’s shoulders. Except instead of urging me to do something nefarious or kind, part of me says “keep fighting” and the other side says “He’s so heavy. Just give up position, its ok”. If you’ve never experienced these sort of thoughts, then you are tougher than most. Over the years of training I’ve been able to minimize and for the most part extinguish that voice that tells me I should give up. Early on it was very tough for me and required a lot of mental focus not to succumb to those mental suggestions caused by frustration and fatigue.

One of my favorite aspects of competitions or extremely competitive rolls is that they can definitely help bring out the best in us. They can also bring the worst out. If I may, I’d like to share a story of a tournament match I had years ago.

One very insightful competition match that I experienced came from the days when I was a blue belt. I had finished finals for school and came down to a tournament in Tennessee. I did not cut weight nor did I pay much attention to my weight. I had been busy with school, barely trained for the tournament and just figured, “what the hell, I’ll just compete.” I ended up winning my division fairly easily, but the real fun came in the open division. As luck would have it, I fell right at the weight cut off. The weight divisions were 193.9lbs and under and 194lbs and over.  I weighed in at 194.5lbs. . . go figure.

My first match pitted me up against a bruiser wrestler. His name escapes me but I do remember that he weighed around 225lbs with a substantial amount of that being lean muscle. I also remember that he had wrestled in college for 4 years. I also recall being a bit intimidated by his much larger physique. Once our match began the first few minutes went very poorly for me. I was taken down several times and the point spread was up to 12-0 in his favor. Then he mounted me, and this is where things got interesting. See, this tournament had a skunk rule. Meaning if he was up 15 to my 0 then he would receive a technical win. The mount being a 4 point move, meant that he was 3 seconds away from securing the win and thus making me look like I didn’t belong on the mat with him.

This is a moment where I personally had this conversation with myself. I remember this moment vividly. I was so angry for letting him get so far ahead on points. He was strong and had used his wrestling to deny me my usual comfortable top game position. I was just frustrated. Somehow I dusted away the frustration and turned it into determination. I thought to myself “I can’t give up this easy! I need to at least make him work for his win.” Fun Fact, when I compete I am not always worried solely about winning. Yes, winning is high on the priority list, but win or lose I want it to be a good competitive match. Anyways, after having these thoughts rush through my head I manage to escape mount and rally back. Once I made it out of mount he never scored another takedown or a single point for that matter and I was able to rack up 10 points. With about a minute of the match left and the end closing, he shot in for the takedown, I sprawled and attempted a guillotine choke and pulled guard. The choke didn’t stick and my arm slipped off his sweaty neck.  Then I attempted a kimura sweep. He stuffed the sweep but I caught a snag on his arm, transitioning to the kimura, I desperately tried to crank the arm to finish. This moment in the match was kind of neat because it was only a few seconds but I remember noticing everyone in the crowd around us, minus his teammates of course, cheering for me. I was the smaller BJJ guy trying to topple the larger wrestler. I also remember looking of my shoulder as I held onto the kimura lock. I could see his face getting redder by the second as he flexed his arm, keeping it stiff and denying me the finish. Lastly I remember looking at my arms shaking as they were fully flex and fatigued from the long match and a voice in my head encouraging me, “Come on!”.

Sadly I was not able to finish the lock and the bruiser wrestler had his hand raised in victory. I suppose the silver lining was that I wore him out during our match. Because in his next match he was finished in 30 seconds via armbar by a guy we all called Brazilian Mike. Strangely enough Brazilian Mike wasn’t from Brazil or Brazilian. If I was able to wear him down that much, in my mind, meant that it was a good match. The best part about this particular match was that it gave me a clear example of how powerful the mental side of things can be. After reflecting on this match, I realized how valuable it is to have the ability to deal with frustration and uncomfortable feelings while being under heavy physical and mental pressure.

There is an interesting feeling that happens during a tournament match or competitive roll in the gym. That feeling is when you feel someone’s body relax and give up, even if it is just for a second. Think back to your own experiences. Have you ever had a good roll with someone and were trying to secure a pass, sweep or submission, and eventually after a struggle you felt their defensive hand positioning and body positioning give way to your attempts? You may even know this sensation from being the one who mentally broke and allowed the person to pass, sweep or submit. During this match I was almost the one that mentally broke. I was fortunate enough to have the resolve to wipe away the defeatist mindset and come back strong in the match. This was a result of hard training and preparation.

 The Take Away

After reading this I want you to think for a second. Have you ever let your own personal demon get the better of you during your training? Have you ever found yourself rolling in the gym or in a competition having a conversation inside your head contemplating giving up when things get a little tough? Have you ever been training and just got frustrated because you were in a tough spot and ended up making tons of mistakes as a result of your own frustration? Maybe you just find yourself not pushing through a little discomfort caused by fatigue and sitting out a round during training. If you do any of these things, like most of do, then I have a simple challenge for you. Push through it. Developing mental toughness is very much a personal thing. I can’t develop mental toughness for you and you can’t develop it for me. Your coaches and training partners can help assist, but ultimately, it is up to you to push yourself past your perceived limitations.

 

5 Tips

  • Simply be aware of your faults. Start by thinking about situations where you feel the most frustration of discomfort. After pinpointing them, prepare for it next time. Drill to correct mistakes and be ready to relax in those rough spots. It’s always easier to deal with something if you’re prepared.
  • Positional rolling. Let’s say that you have a horrible time escaping mount and it’s a position that causes you the most trouble. After you drill some escapes. Grab a partner with a good mount and perform escape or submit rounds from mount. Meaning, if you escape, restart in mount and if your partner submits you, restart in mount. This concentrated exposure will desensitize you to the position and allow you to become more calm and composed.
  • Learn to push yourself in training when you’re uncomfortable.  When you become tired or fatigued and feel like you’ve reached your limit. Keep going! Train yourself to push through the mentally accepted limitations and learn to function even when you’re uncomfortable or tired.
  • Hard rolling. Going hard in the gym will help you develop the kind of grit you need to be assertive on the mat. It will also help you develop the resolve to continue fighting even when your opponent is coming at you strong.
  • Being in good shape helps. If you are preparing for a tournament it really helps to be in good physical condition. From my experience many times people mentally break because they get tired and fatigued.

*Note that training hard and pushing yourself past your limits is not necessary day to day, all year round. However, if you are experiencing hangups anywhere or are preparing for competitions, its definitely worth doing.

As always, thanks for reading!

10 years in BJJ and 10 lessons I’ve learned (Part 2)

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(me on the far left. 2007)

“A black belt is a white belt who never quit.” – Unknown

 

“A black belt only covers two inches of your ass. You have to cover the rest.” – Royce Gracie

 

I don’t chase belts, I chase techniques – Tony Spencer (when asked about when he would receive his black belt)

 

2. Don’t worry about belts or stripes – Something I’ve never understood is the obsession people have with their belt rank and stripes. I can honestly say I never cared about the speed at which I received my promotions. From the beginning I was just concerned with getting better. I enjoyed the training and loved being in the gym with my friends, and I figured the belt would come when it came. Although there was a time once, when my first instructor told me that I was getting close to purple belt. He did this to provide motivation so that I would push myself in training, and I did. This was a huge deal for me. You may not know this but I started my training under a purple belt, and in the beginning I felt like that would be a level of skill I would never reach. The thought of closing in on something that originally seemed unattainable was quite the mental boost. When he told me this I bought a purple sweatband and before class I would slip it on my ankle. Looking down at the purple band would help keep my mind focused during hard training sessions. But even with the sweatband and the thought of snagging the level of purple belt I did not once actually care about how soon I received the promotion. I was focused on my training and my progression, not the piece of dyed cotton that is supposed to represent my abilities. I was probably more nervous about being promoted than excited. I felt like I needed to really push myself in order to be worthy of wearing the belt. I would rather be a white belt with black belt ability, instead of a black belt with white belt skill.

I guess understanding my relationship with belts is maybe different than others so I will explain. First off, I didn’t receive a single stripe until I was a purple belt and had switched to a new gym. My first gym didn’t offer them. On a side note, I think that not having stripes for so long is one of the reasons I am so sporadic with striping my students.  If you’re one of my students reading this, I’m sorry.

My outlook on belts was also altered by the fact that I started under a purple belt. I mean I suppose becoming a black belt was one of the goals but try and put yourself into my shoes for a second. My teacher was a purple belt, which means I would have to ascend to a level of skill that wasn’t visible to me. Then, you hardly ever saw black belts at tournaments. If you went to a tournament, the coordinators might be lucky enough to scrape together a brown and a black belt for a super fight. Back then seeing a black belt, for me, was like looking at some super hero or mythical creature. NOW, almost every BJJ gym around has at least 1 black belt with many schools boasting numerous black belts. The new wave of students coming in can look at their instructors and know they have a guide to the top. I didn’t have a black belt to train under consistently until the later stages of my purple belt. I think that starting in these circumstances really affected my mindset on rank and made me care less about it. I didn’t believe that I would become a black belt, so I simply focused on training and improving myself

I did finally achieve the promotion to black belt on July 9th, 2011 from Master Renato Tavares under the approval of my coaches Kyle and Colin Cannon. Though, I didn’t actually feel like a black belt until October of that year when I went to the Miami Open. This was my first big tournament as a black belt and it was intense. I remember warming up in the bull pen staring at all of the other black belts around me. I would fixate on their belts and think “man. . . black belt. . . bad ass” and then I would stare at my own waist with the same color tied around it. I was a black belt but I didn’t really feel like one. In some ways I still felt like that white belt from 2003. Then I had my first match which I won by submission after playing a dominant game. That match made me feel like I was where I belonged and made me realize that I was in fact a quality black belt.

 

The Take Away

When you train do you care about the belts and stripes over your training? If you roll with a person who has more stripes than you do and you submit them, do you think you should be promoted to a higher level than them?

If you do, then you’re missing the whole point of the BJJ journey. First off, if you are training at a school that keeps with the tradition of BJJ, expect to put in no less than 7-12 years for a black belt with the average being closer to 10. Are you not up for 10 years to get a black belt? Well then you have two options.

  1. Change martial arts.
  2. Go to a website like www.keikosportsusa.com and buy yourself a black belt. The belt will run you about $20 dollars and will save you a lot of money in the long run with gym dues and what not. Yeah, you didn’t earn it . . . but then again, you weren’t in it for that in the first place.

Now assuming you’re up to the task of investing a nice chunk of your life into this art like so many of us, then let me give you a piece of advice. Don’t worry about the belts and ranks. I promise, if you focus on your training, build relationships, immerse yourself into the community and improve yourself on and off the mats. The belts will come and you will achieve mastery, and just as important, you will receive the countless benefits that BJJ offers. Remember BJJ is a martial art and like any martial art, it’s about improving ourselves and helping us become a better version of ourselves. As an instructor I’ve seen students become frustrated and upset over belts to the point that it negatively affects their training. By allowing yourself not to get so caught up on the belt, you allow your mind to concentrate its focus on yourself!

Thanks for reading!

10 years in BJJ and 10 lessons I’ve learned (Part 1)

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I feel like it was yesterday that I took my first BJJ class. Sadly, that was over 10 years ago. That’s right; I’ve been training Brazilian Jiu-jitsu for over 10 years! Just being able to say this makes me feel proud and super old. In honor of my landmark I came up with 10 solid lessons and experiences I’ve personally learned and share them. Each lesson will have a personal story to accompany it and then I’ll give a take-away. I will share highs and lows as well as some embarrassing moments in my BJJ career. I hope that you get something out of the stories and the lessons that go with them.

“Humility does not mean thinking less of yourself than of other people, nor does it mean having a low opinion of your own gifts. It means freedom from thinking about yourself at all.” – William Temple

“There is no respect for others without humility in one’s self.” – Henri-Frederic Amiel

“Self-praise is for losers. Be a winner. Stand for something. Always have class, and be humble.” – John Madden

“Arrogance invites ruin; humility receives benefits.” – Chinese Proverb

1.Be a humble person to those around you  – When I started training BJJ I was 18 years old. After about 6 months of constant training and competing I received my blue belt. At the time of receiving the belt, there were not many high ranking belts in the area. Most of the “higher” belts were purple belts. My streak of tournament wins combined with how quickly I acquired my blue belt as well as my 19 year old immaturity made me feel like a total “bad ass”. In addition to this, my instructor at the time wasn’t the best for putting a lid on this disrespectful attitude, instead he encouraged it. When I competed, especially at local tournaments, I felt like I was some sort of fighting animal that he could brag about after a win. Sadly, I kind of enjoyed it when I was in my “bad ass” phase. I was still a nice person, but I definitely had an obnoxious streak especially when it came down to winning, losing and competing.

3 examples of my antics

1. After being submitted I would smack the mat and drop the F Bomb.

2. I would gloat about winning constantly.

3. I would talk down about others and their BJJ.

Fast forward to early 2007 I had a conversation with my friend who would eventually become one of my BJJ coaches. He and I met up for lunch and he informed me that I could no longer train at his gym because of the negative associations that came along with my current instructor. At this point I had trained with Colin here and there for a while and considered him a friend. I didn’t want to be unable to hang out and train with my buddy! That moment made me realize the path I was on, and if I continued my path I would end up being like my instructor. He was someone who was isolated in the local BJJ community because of their brashness and poor attitude towards others. I knew deep down that I was not that kind of person, so soon after I separated from my instructor and began the “humblization” process under my new coaches. I am a confident person but I’ve done my best to rid myself of that my previous cocky, egotistical edge. I don’t think I would be a successful instructor, competitor or even liked in the community if I hadn’t done that.  This was one of the best lessons I ever learned through BJJ and has definitely carried over into other aspects in my life.

 

The take away

No one wants to be around a cocky jerk that is full of him or herself. One of the best parts about this sport is the amazing communities, and you cannot be a part of these communities if you don’t lose your ego! If you do not lose these negative traits you will find yourself more and more isolated. People will shy away from training with you. You won’t fit in with your academy because you will be “that guy” everyone loves to tap because he has a big ego. If you somehow manage to retain this nasty quality into your higher ranks you will most certainly be shunned by many of your peers and will have a hard time finding people to cross train with and share knowledge. To top it off, it will severely hinder your ability to learn and grow in skill. Trust me, you don’t want this. Take it from someone who was once “that guy” in the gym.  Just be humble to the people around you.

Competition, visualization and a look into my day

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Today was a bruiser. I didn’t have any interviews for the podcast or private lessons and I am waiting for the hosting issues to get resolved before I can finish the work on the actual website. This freed up my day so I decided to take advantage of it and work hard!

When I weighed in this morning I was 207lbs which is good considering I had a pretty relaxed diet this weekend. I went on a camping trip this weekend and ate food that I normally don’t consume in great quantities like breads so honestly I expected my weight to be up a bit. This means I need to lose about 5lbs so that I will be 207lbs or under in the kimono. Whenever I am getting ready for an IBJJF style tournament, which has you weigh in right before your match, I aim to be a couple of pounds lighter than I need to be. This lets me enjoy a good breakfast on the day of competition. I am kind of a fat kid at heart and going without a sizable breakfast isn’t an option and when the day of competitions comes I want to focus on the match not having to lose a few extra pounds.

Here is what my day looked like. . .

11am-12:15pm: BJJ Takedowns. 10 minutes total of takedown rounds and then 15 minutes of rolling starting from the knees

12:30pm-1:30pm: Heavy deadlifts. Did work with 80% of my one rep max. Then some stretching.

 

7pm-8:10pm: More gi takedowns. Again 10 minutes total of takedown rounds and then 15 minutes of rolling from the knees.

8:15pm-8:50pm: Did the “Filthy Fifty” workout.  If you’ve never done the workout before it’s a lot of fun. Here’s what it is . . .

For time:
50 Box jump, 24 inch box
50 Jumping pull-ups
50 Kettlebell swings, 1 pood
Walking Lunge, 50 steps
50 Knees to elbows
50 Push press, 45 pounds
50 Back extensions
50 Wall ball shots, 20 pound ball
50 Burpees
50 Double unders

This work out is considered a chipper workout. Meaning it’s long and tough, and you have to simply chip away at it.

8:55pm-9:20pm: Live wrestling for takedowns. Going to wrestling straight after that workout was rough, but I did well and was happy I pushed through my fatigue.

 

I felt great today. The camping trip this weekend helped me clear my head a bit and I felt really refreshed on the mats today.  That being said, it was still rough and required a lot of focus.

Whenever I have rough days like this when I am leading up to a tournament I try to use visualization as a motivation.  When I am drilling my takedowns I am not taking down my partner, I am taking down an unnamed opponent in the competition. When my grip starts to fade during a heavy set of deadlifts I think about my opponent finishing their rep and clinch the bar tighter. When I am exhausted after a hard workout I think about my opponents training past discomfort and head back to the mats for wrestling.

This may sound silly but visualization is such a powerful technique that comes in handy when I am training for a competition and need an extra boost of motivation during hard sessions. Even if I am not preparing for a competition, if I have a goal I want to achieve, then visualization is something I use. During the hard work that is necessary to achieve any worthwhile goal (BJJ or otherwise) if I find my motivation waning, I start to visualize. Visualize overcoming the obstacles that stand in my way. Visualize how my hard work will aid in my road to attainment, and visualize the satisfaction of achieving my goal. No matter how tired I might be. When I think about these three things I get fired up to get after whatever it is I need to do.

I am tired so if this post came across as poorly thrown together I do apologize. I am a bit wipe so I am going to head to bed and get ready for another tough day tomorrow!

As always, thanks for reading.

If you have any questions or comments, feel free to leave them below or send an email to chewjitsu@gmail.com

Balancing work and hard training leading up for competition.

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(That’s me on the right at my first tournament in 2003!)

 

 

It’s Monday and that means it’s a post about leading up to the competitions. I figured I would share what a typical Monday looks like for me and then talk about planning your days to get the most out of them.

Since starting the podcast, Monday, has become my lightest day of training and probably my busiest actual day of the week.  I’ll give an idea of what it looks like.

7-8:30AM: Wake up. I know this is going to sound silly but I’ve actually found that a side benefit of drinking lots of water is that I wake up to use the restroom earlier than the time my alarm clock is set. The benefit of this is that I don’t wake up to a nasty alarm clock sound and feel much better when I open my eyes.  During this time period I eat breakfast, goof around on the computer for a bit, maybe watch BJJ videos or something. If the weather is pleasant, which is has been, I’ll sit out on the deck and drink my morning cup of coffee and relax. This is my “holy hour”, a little chunk of time to just be alive without having to worry about anything and do whatever I want. If you currently don’t have a holy hour, you should find a little bit of time in your day to schedule one. Doing this does wonders for me personally.

8:30-9:40AM: Answer emails and social media messages I have, glance over my to-do list, review over the techniques I’m showing that day, and then work on any projects I might have going. I will usually head to the gym around 9:40am and get there at 10am.

10:00-10:45AM: Lifting or Metcon

10:45-12:30PM: Stretching followed by my morning class. Mondays are always takedown days. After class I will chat with everyone, get a couple extra rolls in or help students with questions they might have.

12:30-3:00PM: Protein shake with a snack followed by working on my podcast website. Then around 1:30 I start interviews for the show.

3:00-4:00PM: Lunch with a coffee/tea break then I pick up one of my students and bring him to the gym.

4:00-6:45PM: Blog and website stuff, customer service work for the gym.

6:45-9:30PM: A light warm up then BJJ class from 7-8 with wrestling starting at 8. Wrestling is always fun and I love the analogy of calling it “fighting without punches” because it is such a rough sport. If you’re gym offers wrestling you should definitely take advantage of that opportunity!

9:30-12:00ishAM: Head home to relax, eat a light dinner and finish any small work I might have. Then I try to always read for an hour before I head to bed. More often than not it’s something history or non fiction. I just finished a book called Mastery and another called The Last Lion.

 

Now I am not sharing the schedule because I am gloating about being busy or because I am trying to show you how much I train. Rather the reason is because everything I did today was scheduled. I’ve found that for me personally when I am well rested and relaxed I am in a much better state of mind about planning out what I should do with my time. However, if I am run down by a long day or consumed by work I need to get done. Having to make the conscious decision to train becomes more difficult and I tend to slack a little.

Routine and accountability to the rescue

Sitting down on a Sunday night and making out a schedule helps me get the things I need to get done. . . DONE! Now most people aren’t as fortunate as me to teach and train for a living, but mapping out a schedule still applies. I remember working 60 hours a week in IT and being exhausted after work. After leaving work following a 10+ hour day, training didn’t seem quite as attractive as normal. I’m sure you’ve felt this way before, right?

This is where the schedule comes into play! You must take the choice away from your weary self and place it into the hands of your well rested self. With a written schedule you don’t have to weigh the options of either exerting yourself in training or just taking it easy for the night after work. Instead you can look down and see what you planned for yourself and follow the guide.  Now there is something to be said about listening to your body, and if you are feeling absolutely terrible then maybe you should take a night off. But, have you ever skipped a work out only to get home and regret the choice, or have you ever went to the gym a little groggy only to leave pumped up about your training? I know I’ve personally done both.

 

The reason I put this “schedule talk” into this competition post is because getting ready for a competition can sometimes be tough, and it’s easy to get side tracked by life and skip a workout. The problem with this is, each day you skip a workout a day of preparation is lost, and when you’re getting yourself ready for a competition you have a fix amount of time to get ready. A wasted day of training is simply something you cannot afford.  By giving yourself a schedule to follow you make sure that you’re getting your training, work, and other responsibilities and obligations taken care of, as well as finding time for yourself. Plus, there is a bit of accountability.  It’s a little more difficult to skip out on things when you look down and see the goals you set for yourself staring back at you.

 

You may not experience the same problems I have and this may not be necessary for you. But if you are having issues training on some days, or find yourself slacking sometimes because of laziness. Then try giving yourself a schedule so that you make sure you get done, what it is, you want done. Make the schedule realistic and focused around the goals you have. If the goal is competition then it better consist of lots of hard training and drilling!

 

As always, thanks for reading, and if you have any questions or comments feel free to send them to chewjitsu@gmail.com

11 questions with “That Classy Broad”

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Hows the men to women ratio at your gym? I’m sure it’s similar to most gyms and significantly more men train. However I can say that right now, there are more women training Brazilian Jiu-jitsu at my gym than ever before and I think its fantastic! With all the new women in the gym I asked them if there is anything that they were particularly interested in regarding BJJ. Many of them shared the same desire to hear from high level females in the BJJ community. I decided to reach out to a few of the women I know and ask them some questions.

We will start with Katie’s responses first. First off big thanks to Katie at http://skirtonthemat.wordpress.com/ for her insights on what its like to be a woman in BJJ. The responses are genuine and detailed.  I hope you enjoy the question and answers listed below!

1.       Tell me about yourself (Name, rank, years training, your line of work, any other info you’d like to share)

Katie, brown belt, 7 years this August, marketing coordinator for a real estate company, writer of SkirtontheMat, bookworm, klutz, etc. I currently train at Maxercise Academy in Philadelphia.  http://www.maxercise.com/Home.html

2.       What got you started in training?

The simple answer to that is I was working at the front desk of the academy at the time, and it was suggested I try out the class. It wasn’t my first encounter with grappling or even jiu jitsu: I have an older brother who wrestled in highschool and college, so being unexpectedly put into a clinch wasn’t really that foreign of a concept. Additionally, I can be pretty clumsy-so falling to the ground is not a terribly foreign concept either. Also while in college I was a part of the school’s radio station, and became friends with some of my co-hosts who were big fans of MMA: we would get together at someone’s house and watch UFC (back when it was once every 3 months or so) or Pride fights. I was interested in it, but also back then I was a lot more shy and it took someone encouraging me to try the sport. I took my first class, and it actually wasn’t until I took a second and third class that I really started to get a hang of it and started to enjoy myself.

3.       Did you have any initial fears about training, if so how/when did you get over those?

Um, there was an initial anxiety, partially because everyone is naturally anxious in new situations. Additionally I think women are often encouraged to avoid full contact sports, which is really the biggest objection I hear when I talk to other women about trying jiu jitsu. Third, I had gained a lot of weight when I was in school which made me feel insecure. Not that I’ve ever been described as tiny, but the college lifestyle had definitely taken its toll. I would be partnered with someone to train, and especially in the beginning when you could obviously tell the weight discrepancy, and there were times I almost felt the need to apologize to my partner for being so…big. There’s no better way I can describe it. There were a variety of initial fears, including competition, which is completely natural: it’s not often you’re asked to get up in front of a bunch of people and try your hardest to choke someone or manipulate their joints in a way that could potentially injure them. But I find that facing those competition fears can lend to facing other anxieties, etc. in everyday life. You have already proven you can be anxious or scared of something, still “put your big girl pants on” and try your best, which I feel is an invaluable experience.

As what got me past anxiety about training, I think part of it had to do with the fact that I started to see results, belt changes, weight loss, a boost in confidence. For the most part the other students and instructors were patient and helpful, and it was pretty fun. I’m also goal oriented, and jiu jitsu became something I wanted to get better at, which kept me motivate to press on. Hooray for being stubborn and stuff. 🙂

4.       What drives you to continue training?

A variety of reasons: I love puzzle/problem solving, and each training session has the potential to present a puzzle that needs to be solved. Also, personally it’s a great way to relieve stress. We all worry and sometimes over-think a situation, over-analyze conversations throughout the day, and a good hard training session is a great way to see “the forest for the trees” again- a way to kind of reset your perspective. The community is also a big aspect for me as well: we are very fortunate to have a great team with people from all walks of life coming through the door and welcomed onto the mats. We train hard, respect and support one another, even if that means pushing a fellow student to help them reach their goal.

5.       What has been the biggest challenge of your BJJ career?

Ha, I have the same challenge as a lot of people- myself. Well, not me specifically. I think a lot of people, are hard on themselves and how well they do: in competition and sometimes even sparring.  While a lot of this sport is physical and muscle memory, there is a lot of thinking, and particularly believing in yourself and your technique, and there is a tendency to lose sight of that. We toil, day in and out on these myriad of minute details- put your hand here, place your foot there, make sure you have just the right angle, match after match during training sessions that I think it’s easy to get lost and not really see the big picture. We beat ourselves up over a submission we didn’t get, all the while completely ignoring the beautiful sweep that was executed in the very same match. It’s a bit funny, and frustrating at times.

6.       Are you a competitor, if so why do you compete?

Er, by technical definition, I guess I would say yes, I am a competitor: I train a lot, work out, diet, attend competitions and I enjoy competing in the fact that I feel accomplished win or lose if I step off the mat and really feel I put my skills to the test. I don’t really keep track of how many matches I have won, I’ve given most of my medals to the gym (I couldn’t even tell you which ones were mine), and instead I think about what I could have done better, and have even taken notes after a competition on things that I need to work on, using that opportunity to grow and advance as a jiu jitsu player (jiu jitsuka, whatever we’re calling ourselves these days).

 

7. Are there any resources or helpful tools that you use or would recommend to someone who trains?

Instructor, really would be my answer. I dabble here and there looking at Youtube videos, particularly if there is something I want to work on and I need to brush up on. There’s no one video channel I’m particularly attached to, though I like what I have seen so far from the BJJ Library. There are some cool things someone at an equal or higher rank will show that I’ll play around with to see if it will fit into my game, but the main thing is I’m a visual and kinesthetic learner: I have to see the technique being done to someone else, and then I need to do it myself to fully understand it. I am more concerned about what I learn during class or on the mats that I can drill, reference with a higher rank and drill again, rather than some crazy video I watched maybe once or twice.

 

8. Any funny story you’d like to share?

One of the fun things about traveling for competitions is there’s at least one good story, one memory you’ll take with you, regardless of winning or losing. We all went out together to this past year’s Pans: one of our blue belt guys competed, lost his first match, and came back to where we were sitting in the stadium to share with us,

“So, I went up to the acai stand the the guy was telling me how this stuff on top is good for memory, and this [topping] was great for athletes…I asked if he had anything for shame. He didn’t say anything.”

There are tons of moments you’ll gather throughout the years: if you have the time and means, one of the great things about jiu jitsu is the opportunity to travel for (usually for competition) to new places and meet new people, and you’ll have the opportunity to create a lifetime of memories.

 

9. Have you ever had to use your BJJ to protect yourself?

Fortunately, no. I am glad to know the self defense stuff and some judo, but also immensely glad that I have never had a need to use either: I am a big believer in being aware of your surroundings, and listening to your instinct when it’s telling you something’s not right.


10. How do you deal with training in a predominantly male sport?

When it comes to being a woman in jiu jitsu, there are some things that are great and then some elements that just suck. And, there are some decisions that are made when it comes to women, particularly divisions in tournaments where you think “who the hell thought that was a good idea?” And don’t even get me started about some of the gi choices. Yikes. Thankfully I think they stopped making the pink camouflage gi’s. Also, fortunately as the years go on and more women become involved in the sport, I think there will be less issues. There are some that will still persist however, particularly on a more local level. You’ll have men who enter an academy and doubt a woman’s ability due to their gender, there’s still a good chance when a woman will be the only female in a class- which being the token member of the opposite gender can be just as awkward the other way around. The sport in general has a high rate of attrition, and it’s extremely noticeable when it comes to women, which leads to a lot of competing against the same women in tournaments, even at national levels. We take these things in stride for the love of the sport. There is hope though: while our voice is still a small one in the jiu jitsu community, it is growing especially as more females become black belts.

 

11. Anything you’d like to share with females out there?

Um. nothing that I can think of- if anyone has a question for me I’ll be happy to answer; they can email me at thatclassybroad at gmail, go through you, whatever, but there’s nothing in particular that comes to mind.

As always, thanks for reading! Feel free to share any comments or thoughts in the section below or by email at chewjitsu@gmail.com .